Bush doesn't make beans

In case you haven't been eating your Bush's baked beans because you did not wish to support our Presidents famiy, consider this. There have been no proven links to George W. Bush and Bean magnate Buddy Bush. Buddy makes the beans. When I asked Buddy if he supports Bush or Kerry, he said. "I just make the beans son." I thanked him for his beans, especially the kind with maple syrup in them, and said goodbye. Buddy turned and walked away. I thought I had offended him, but after a few steps he let out a short but very noble sounding toot, which belayed all my fears.

Screaming at the Funny Money Dummy

I'm no genius when it comes to finances.  However, a couple of weeks back I was listening to Bill Clinton hawking his book on Al Franken's Show on Air America and he let this little wonky factoid slip that I just can't get out of my head.
 
Bill said that the Bush administration had to borrow money from China to cover the tax refunds.  Now I can't find out exactly which year he was talking about - 2001, 2003 or both?  But man, this is seriously f'd up.
 
So I looked high and low and this was the best article I could find (read: most dumbed down for me).  I found out that the reason it was so hard to find is because they are making a concerted effort to keep this info in the back pages of the papers.  So check it out here from WaPo.  
 

Abu Giraffe Comin Atcha ... Again!

Opening night one of my dear, dear friends came up to tell me how much she enjoyed the show.  I, of course, thanked her and then asked her what she really thought.  She told me she really liked it.  I thanked her again and asked her what she really really thought.  She then whispered "am I the only one who feels kinda sorry for that little Lynndie England girl?"
 
No, she's not.  When I first saw the pictures of the prisoners abused in Abu Ghraib I was devastated.  I'm an army brat.  When I was a teenager I did theatre on military bases with 22-year old enlisted women in the army in Germany.  I remember how much they loved being in the military, the freedom, the challenges, the potential for advancement.  (I'm old... these were the olden days.)  I looked up to those young women and even considered following their path into the military. 
 
Those sickening pictures hit me hard on so many levels.  Our play is now in the middle of its third installment.  As far as I know there have been at least three ex-soldiers in the cast at various times.  At least one of them was a reservist like this Lynndie England.  And as far as her superiors, the Military Intelligence guys, my dad was in Military Intelligence. 
 
Senator Joseph Biden said "There's a reason why we sign these treaties: to protect my son in the military.  That's why we have these treaties. So when Americans are captured, they are not tortured. That's the reason, in case anybody forgets it."  When that made such a big splash in the news I was a little surprised.  But then I grew up in the military (and Germany)  and knew that in my bones. 
 
And growing up in Germany gives you this tangible shining beacon on the hill to look forward to:  The States.  As a teen, I was aware that if I got into mischief and the Polizei picked me up I didn't have the same basic rights as I would in The States.  When my brother was expelled from seventh grade for "Heil Hitlering" his German Science teacher (he was being a dick) I learned about freedom of speech that was only protected in The States.  And I believed that the kind of torture that was depicted in the pictures at Dachau would never happen in The States.  Yes I know, I'm using hyperbole now.  There were no gas chambers at Abu Ghraib.  And Abu Ghraib was not in The States.  However, the SS were better supported than the soldiers at Abu Ghraib, and you can read about that in this excerpt from today's US News and World Report.   
 

Another classified annex reported that the prison complex was seriously overcrowded, with detainees often held for months without ever being interrogated. Detainees walked around in knee-deep mud, "defecating and urinating all over the compounds," said Capt. James Jones, commander of the 229th MP Company. "I don't know how there's not rioting every day," he testified.

Among the more shocking exchanges revealed in the Taguba classified annexes are a series of E-mails sent by Maj. David Dinenna of the 320th MP Battalion. The E-mails, sent in October and November to Maj. William Green of the 800th MP Brigade and copied to the higher chain of command, show a frantic attempt to simply get the detainees at Abu Ghraib edible food. Dinenna pressed repeatedly for food that wouldn't make prisoners vomit. He criticized the private food contractor for shorting the facility on hundreds of meals a day and for providing food containing bugs, rats, and dirt. "As each day goes by, tension within the prison population increases," Dinenna wrote. " . . . Simple fixes, food, would help tremendously." Instead of getting help, Major Green scolded him. "Who is making the charges that there is dirt, bugs, or whatever in the food?" Major Green replied in an E-mail. "If it is the prisoners, I would take that with a grain of salt." Dinenna shot back: "Our MP s, medics, and field surgeon can easily identify bugs, rats, and dirt, and they did." Ultimately, the food contract was not renewed, an Army spokeswoman says, although the company holds other contracts with the military.

And one final little secret about why this is so personal to me.  One final little sexist reason.  Lynndie is a woman.  And I never thought I'd see a woman do this.  When I was a teen growing up on a military base I remember a couple of young soldiers telling me that when women became soldiers it would truly be the end of the world.  All sorts of lame theories were posited; without women to protect who would men be fighting for, women were more cruel and would fight to the death,  men could not kill women... All I know is I never thought that I'd see a woman in the uniform of the oppressor, the torturer.  And when I saw the glee on her face, it destroyed everything I believed about my gender and my country and my world. 

Drudge Resort

Did Matt Drudge see our show or something?

 
'You're Not Going To Have To Look For Us On Vacation'


 
What the hell is his problem? You must click on this link.

Kerry! What a slacker!

Oops... my bad...

Wait a minute... did we say Iraq? We meant Iran... with the "n"... not the "q"... the "n". Sorry about that. Anyway, suit up, strap on the flight suit. We're goin in! Right after the Supreme Courts re-elects W.

Liberty? Libraries? Liberals? (ad libs ad nauseum)

For those of you who have seen Edge of Allegiance, you know that Lady Liberty makes an appearance in our little play.  
 
Did you know she has a secret? 
 

Did you know that according to the July 19th edition of Newsweek, the familiar photo of the tortured Abu Ghraib prisoner hooded and wired up has become known to Iraqis as

"the Statue of Liberty?"

 

Meanwhile, back in 2002 the Newark International Airport was renamed Newark Liberty International Airport.   It was renamed to "honor defenders of freedom and the heroes of Sept. 11."  George Carlin recently pointed out in an interview on Air America Radio that this is an attack on our language. (also known as doublespeak)  If those brave citizens who were working in the towers or flying on the planes on 9/11 had received phone calls that fateful morning warning them of the attacks, would they have chosen to go on with their plans -- thereby "defending our freedom and liberty?" Would you?   We are humans who wake up every morning wanting to have a good day.  Wanting to feed our families and learn something and share a good laugh with some friends when we can.  Just like our neighbors and our enemies.  I don't consider myself particularly brave or heroic, but I'll be damned if I'll sit idly by and let my true freedoms be attacked in the name of liberty.  And I'm talking about the freedom of speech and freedom to inform myself.  The P.A.T.R.I.O.T. Act allows the FBI to sneak a peak at my library record but J. Edgar Asscroft won't allow police to sneak a peak at the gun buying practices of suspected terrorists.  Wooooooo-hooooooooo!  I'm proud to be an Americun where at least I know I'm free to shoot em up but not to read!  Thank you Laura Bush for using your sleeping privileges to influence that man o' yours.  Hail Liberty!

My God, I would have loved to have been in this room. Bush meets the Amish. (free article, but you have to sign in)

Did Bush eat the whoopie pie cookie?

Would you? Let's make some.

Thanks again Matt Drudge

Goodness gracious!  Again I say, what would we do without Matt Drudge to keep us informed about all the perverted goings ons over there at the Kerry/Edwards camp. 
 
Once again, today he's uncovered another doozy about a crazed "Kerry Bumpersticker Groper!".
 
However, my all-time fave campaign perv story still has to be from the Bushies.  Check this out from bartcop.com
 
Alleged sheep abuser behind bars  Bush campaign worker tied up a sheep
 By JEFF REINITZ  
Courier Staff Writer
A Waterloo man has been arrested for allegedly sexually assaulting a sheep at a college farm Wednesday.
 
Students at Hawkeye Community College's farm discovered Bob Broderson hiding naked except for a Bush campaign hat in a hay loft shortly before 8 a.m., according to Waterloo police.

An ewe -- a female sheep -- was tied up in the corner. Broderson tried to flee, but the students captured him and held him until officers arrived, police said. The college's farm manager examined the ewe and determined she had been injured during some type of sexual assault, according to court records.

The sheep had been tied up with a halter rope around the neck, and the legs were positioned so the hindquarters were elevated, according to police. A blue nightgown was next to the ewe, police said.  [note from CC:  ewwwwwe]

ha ha

Because Iowa does not have laws specifically banning sex with animals, police arrested Broderson at Bush-Cheney 2000 headquarters, 423 Locust St., for criminal trespass and animal abuse. Bond was set at $75,000.

Sexual abuse against animals often goes unreported because it takes place in private and the victims can't report it, (because they can't fucking talk, you morons,) according to officials with the Humane Society of the United States.

Imagine being in the same room with this charmer...

Would you like to book Richard Perle to speak at your event? Just call Eleana Benador, and she'll throw in James Woolsey at half price. Maybe she could have a Win-A-Date with Richard Perle contest!

At times like these...

I wish I was working with the Mime Troupe.

"Quit yer dayjob" -J.B., Tenacious D

I have a great dayjob. Well, I work in a really cool place. Complete strangers call me at my job and tell me how badly they wished they worked there. That ever since they were a little child they've dreamed about working exactly where I work.

So it makes it pretty hard to complain.

But I am up for that challenge.


No, seriously, I have a great job, I know it. It could pay better. I could have health benefits. I could actually get a little security in my life for the 40 hours a week I give to the dream factory. But hey, I know I could have it worse. Much worse...

I can't tell you where I work. But you would recognize my lovable overlords from years of consuming popular American culture. I'm proud to be a part of it. I would be prouder still if they could help me with the old doctor bills. Well, I'm working on that...

Anyway... work has picked up lately, which is good for business, bad for keeping up with what's going on... today was a blurry day... things flashed past my computer screen...

Did George W. Bush give some kid the finger? It's impossible to prove- the blogger himself admits the picture didn't come out. But the Washington Post mentioned it (scroll all the way down to the bottom of the column). So did Wonkette. I think I found it through Atrios.

The point is not did he or didn't he. It doesn't matter, because people who already hate him will just see it as more proof of what an unimaginable, unworthy prick he is. People who love him will think it's fucking great. Fucking Bush, man. He's my BOY!

That's what matters. Bush/Cheney started out calling one guy an asshole, Cheney told a U.S. Senator to "fuck himself" and then was all cocky about it.

But c'mon- we're all grownups, right? These are tough times , and these are tough guys with tough jobs using a little tough talk.

Fine. Just keep your God-damned mother fucking hands off the people's airwaves you no-good, hypocritical, moralizing, lying sacks of dog shit.

I love how the truly dumb people are jumping on the Michael Moore bashing bandwagon. Pressed for a reason to hate him, they say he lies. Pressed to explain where he lied, they say they haven't seen the film, because he lies. People say he lies, so he must. Look, at least hav e a good reason. Own up to it. Cite a fact or two. He sticks up for the little guy- just admit you're against the little guy. Here- if you need a reason to question Michael Moore, how about a far-left website's recent article suggesting Moore is in league with the Neocons. This site is so far left, it's practically Middle Earth.. Or Humboldt County...


The Senate debated gay marriage today? Oh, for the love of all that's holy, leave the Constitution alone, you fucking fanatics. George W. Tells us gay marriage threatens the institution of marriage. He doesn't explain how, he just says it. That's how he operates. And half the people seem to go for it. I ask myself, where do the Libertarians stand on this- c'mon you fence sitting clever motherfuckers- raise a stink for the wee gay folk!


Did I stumble across this today? Did we really have a plan to invade Saudi Arabia and take their oil fields back in the 70's? Back when Saddam was a "friend in the region." I know , for half the people the invasion in Iraq was about Freedom and Liberation and the Dictator and feeling like bad ass mother fuckers after getting hit on 9/11, and for the other half it stinks to high Hell and this wasn't the way we thought America should behave... but the oil... let's all admit it... it's ok.... this country would not risk treasure in a region where there wasn't treasure to be found, or protected, or monopolized through support and distribution.


UPDATE: Talk about a long day. I wrote this last night and then blogger went down and I lost it. The Senate Repugs didn't have the votes so they dropped the bill. Bush is running his election as a culture war, and he's losing Republican support. Because he's not a true Republican! I'll bet Ronald Reagan never liked him. I suspect his own dad doesn't like him...no, he's not a Republican... he's something much, much worse... I just hope this phony gay marriage "issue" turns the swings towards Kerry. Grown-up Americans don't like being told how to live.

Random (suicidal) thoughts

Just finished watching "THIRST" on PBS' POV Series.

One more reason I don't believe in keeping a gun in the house. As soon as the show was over I would have found it and used it to blow my brains out.

Few thoughts to recap:

What oil was to the 20th century, water will be to the 21st century.

The words river and rival come from the same root.
 
When the corporations own all the water and the humans have to pay for it, who's going to pay for the water for the animals?  Like the bunnies and the deer and the lions and the tigers and the bears, oh my!  In India women dug wells closer to their land in the deserts to make their lives easier.  Coca cola and Pepsi came in and sucked the water out from underneath them.  It happened.  Wonder why I'm suicidal.
 
The World Bank says someone has to pay for the water.  OK.  Does that mean that someone has to make a profit from it?  This is about creating World Customers instead of World Citizens.  Are you ready to belly up to the water bar?

I'll never buy bottled water again. (I don't really do it as it is. I do use a PUR water filter thing in the fridge so that I can have cold water. I have bought bottled water in the past just for the bottles, so that I can use them to carry water around with me from my fridge. However, my boycott begins today. The Sierra Club has just published a brochure which they will be happy to provide to any group or chapter which wants to join the campaign to discourage the use of bottled water.)

I've said it before, I'll say it again. When the men with the money (Bush/Cheney) have privatized everything -- warriors (halliburton/caci), education (tutors to help our kids pass the endless "No Child Left Behind" tests that have supplanted actual teaching), and water (Municipal infrastructures selling out to Bechtel/Thames/Coca-cola) it won't matter whether they are elected anymore.

 

So go ahead and swallow.  There's plenty more comin your way.

PS.  Heard on the radio that LA is replacing Chlorine with more Cloramine in the tap water.  That's supposedly safe for humans but is gonna kill the fish in your aquariums.  Wonder what it'll do to the fishies in the ocean?  Who cares about the fishies in the oceans anyway?  Bye bye fishies!

Bush vs Tree

I hate trees! Don't you?


evil tree

They poison us everyday with their damn pollution! Let's get rid of em now, before they get rid of us!

Thank god Bush is on my side!

Uh-oh, they're on to us!

If you click on the sitemeter for this blog, then click on the "Organization" link under "Site Tracking," you'll see that someone from the United States Government has been visiting our little blog site.



John? John Ashcroft? Is that YOU? I love your music man... really, "Let The Eagle Soar" gives me a warm feeling in my gut.

I know you are here, John. I smell your cologne.

That's it! I'm voting Repug now!

Crowd Turns Out To See Edwards Go To Church, Including Convicted Peeper... Convicted peeper Samuel Ferebee, in blue shirt, was one of many who greeted Sen. Edwards following church services.

Thank god for Matt Drudge!

The daily bottom feeder points out in his yellow-journalism rag that the new VP candidate actually shook hands with a convicted felon!

Now I know I have to vote Repugnicunt! No way can I support a candidate who would shake hands with a crowd of people who includes this type of scum. And you know that the guy probably told him up front that he was a perv! I don't see a sign on the fella in the pic, but any VP candidate should know these things!

Bush and Cheney would never shake hands with criminals.

George Bush doesn't have any friends

He certainly doesn't know the other guy in this picture, right?

That guy would be Ken Lay of Enron fame. I missed all the blackout fun here in California since we were in NYC then, but to commemorate Ken Lay's indictment today I thought I'd post this link to a great free CBS news story.

Listen to them ream your grandma!

not... having..... fun...... Still?

Wise words from Santa Clause to the Narrator that Ruined Christmas:

It's not about you, douchebag. No one needs your self-important grandstanding. Don't you see? You showbiz types are just trying to shift the focus away from the crisis and on to yourselves. You're an entertainer. It's a simple job, ok? Do a dance, show us your boobs and make us happy, monkey!

(Music starts)

We know you're important, with thoughts in your head
but it's hard for us to take it.
So get back in your cage, paint your ass red
and shake, shake, shake it!

Now that's some good thee-ater

The Crushing of The Soul

I spent the better part of Monday listening to my favorite radio station Air America Radio. It being a holiday (Cinco de Julio?) The O'Franken Factor was on vacation and it was an old chestnut of a rerun. After Al's regular features, "The Oy Oy Oy Report," the daily visit with Dittohead Mark Luther and a great segment with Calvin Trillin, there were about eight minutes left for open lines. Since Trillin had touched on Bush's misuse of the English language in his new book, "Obliviously On He Sails : The Bush Administration in Rhyme", the calls started streaming in with complaints about how Bush says "newcular," "amerkan," "abu giraffe," etc. You could hear the frustration rise as hosts Al and Katherine hoped to get to something a little more substantial. Finally Al had to say that yes, W. talks funny but there are so many more important issues that are facing us today.

And that is how I'm feeling right about now.

This little play that we're working on, ya' mighta heard of it somewhere else on this page, started off with such great expectations. I'm not exactly sure how I can say that since when we signed on the script wasn't completed, but what we expected is not what we're working with now. And there lies the rub. As actors we're expected to shut off our brains, paint our asses red and dance, monkey, dance! Right?

But acting in theatre in Hollywood is not like acting anywhere else. In this town, theatre is the ugly stepsister to the true Cinderella that is the film industry -- and god knows there're way too many enchanted rats running around to give this story a happy ending. The protections for union stage actors in Los Angeles are worse than any other major city. But in LA, actors will do it. (Along with folks who call themselves actors.) They will work for free since they believe this is their way to get kissed by the prince. No more pumpkins for me! Meanwhile, people who make their money OFF actors -- and that has to be the second major industry in LaLa land -- are raking in the dough.

Which brings me to my current dilemma. I call myself a theatre atheist. I do theatre for the moment. I am not in it for some magical afterlife of milk and honey where I will call the shots and own everybody. I don't do it to lead to something else, like an agent or a movie career. When I choose to do a play for little or no money, I have to be willing to perform the written words for an audience of NONE, since that is often the case in this town. I only do theatre in which I believe. And I mean it. Why in the hell would I do some piece of crap in NoHo where the "actors" don't even know when to start the play (uh... that would be when all the lights go down and come back up again) and no one is going to show up except for other actors who owe us a favor because we saw their piece of poop at Masquers for free but had to pay $30 for crappy pizza and two diet cokes?

So here we are doing a play for "the message." And what is that message? Well, it was hard to know up front when the script wasn't delivered until two weeks after rehearsals began ... but it did start off promisingly. There was a "workshop" with input accepted from the cast and discussion of the issues. But maybe that's where things went terribly, terribly wrong. Because what we have now is a cartoon. And that cartoon is about things like Laura Bush killing Condi Rice and Dick Cheney trying to kill W. so he can become president. WHY WOULD HE NEED TO DO THAT? HE ALREADY IS THE PRESIDENT!



Look at this picture! Who is in charge here?

And now that the question has been raised by the 9/11 commission about whether Cheney really even consulted Bush when he ordered planes shot down over D.C. I propose that he was talking about himself, Dick Cheney, when he said "Pursuant to the president's instructions, I gave authorization for them to be taken out." The reason Bush sat in that classroom in Florida for so long is that he was waiting for instructions from the President, Cheney. And the reason they didn't come is because President Cheney was busy shooting down planes.

Come on. Doesn't this make as much sense as anything else? Cheney is the evil uncle in this scary tale. Bush has obviously been rejected by Bush the Elder and has been adopted by evil Uncle Dick, Uncle Dick who served in Daddy's cabinet. And why would the Evil One show his face if he can hang little Georgie out for target practice?

But back to this play that I'm a working on...

This thing has Cheney plotting to kill Bush and Laura killing Condi. Now I happen to play Laura and I happen not to care for her one whit. But I'll be damned if I'm going to make shit up about her killing someone when there's truth to be told that's so much richer. And who in their right mind would make up some ri-goddam-diculous theory about the First Lady of these United States murdering someo- .... oh ...uh... nevermind. However, just because the rightwingnuts did it, doesn't mean I will. So screw it. For the first time in my career I'm going to refuse to say a line or depict a character the way it was written in the script. However, if the script had been presented to me in this form before I agreed to do the damn thing, I wouldn't have taken the role. So we are at a standstill...

And yesterday, when I was talking to my wonderful friend Joe Q. about this funk that has descended on me and why I'm eating my insides out, slowly, one bite at a time, what did he say? He laughed and said "There's no way you can do something you don't believe in. It's just not you. Your integrity won't allow it." I was gratified to hear that since in the middle of this I am of course filled with self doubt. Is this some weird ego trip? Am I somehow freaking out way beyond what it's worth? Is this just part of the painful birthing process that we call creativity and/or tech week? (a distinct possiblity ... read: if the reviews say I'm "perfect" again, then all bets are off ... bad actor! bad actor!)

But just like Al Franken said, "There are enough scary things about this administration." We don't need to make shit up.

Cassandra Prophetess of Doom Updates #1 and #2
It's not easy. We tried. See comments.

not... having..... fun......

MATT DRUDGE ADVOCATES THE ASSASSINATION OF JOHN KERRY

Matt Drudge, the muckraking "citizen journalist" who runs The Drudge Report commemmorated this country's Independence Day by advocating the assassination of Democratic Presidential Candidate,John Kerry (D-Mass).

Buried halfway through his daily assortment of political hype and typical gossip-column fare was a blatant message to his largely right-wing readership, "Aim at Big City Liberal," followed by an instructional photo.

Developing...

Radio at the Beach

Spread your towel out, put on some sunscreen, have a lay-back and turn on your portable hi-fi radio for a sacrilegious satire of John Lennon's Great American Tune.

Anybody up for a swim?

Who wants to start a pool?

How long before Saddam Hussein is back in power? Days? Weeks? Months? Minutes?

"Everyone all over the world agrees that Saddam Hussein should be put on trial in front of the Iraqi people," said Baghdad resident Ahmad al-Lami.

However, the turmoil of the past 14 months has led to a longing for the stability and order of the ousted dictatorship, at least among Sunni Arab Muslims who now feel threatened by the possibility of a Shiite-dominated government.

Nostalgia for Hussein -- a Sunni -- is strongest in Sunni-dominated parts of the country most heavily involved in the insurgency.

"Saddam Hussein was a national hero and better than the traitors in the new government," a resident of Hussein's hometown of Tikrit told APTN, refusing to give his name.

In Fallujah, an insurgent stronghold west of Baghdad, resident Ammar Mohammed suggested the Americans should be put on trial first, because they "killed thousands if Iraqis in one year of occupation."

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